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Recursion

by Tenacious Bird Of Prey

/
1.
I'm not here to follow you. but I'm not here to lead you at all. I'm not here to doubt what you say, but do not take that to mean that I believe. How can it be? How can it be, that I can look for ever, and that's no promise that I'll see? I can't ease my mind. I can't ease my mind. Though I try. Oh, lord I try. The blade of grass bends in the storm while the trees they fall one by one. The drop of water goes around the mountain while it cuts a valley underneath How can it be? How can it be that the line that saved my love is now a noose around me? I can't ease my mind. I can't ease my mind. Though I try. Oh, how I try. If I ain't got it, and they don't want it lord won't you see that it's fit that I be freed? These words they weave like a prayer in me, but such a cold thin cloth against the winter of my mind. How can it be? How can it be that I can look for ever, and that's no promise that I'll see. I can't ease my mind. I can't ease my mind. Though I try. Oh, how I try.
2.
The day I was born, they gave me no name. This poor boy was a child of shame. Lord, don't you cry. The day I turned 13 was the day I left town. The moon was my blanket. The bed was the ground. Lord, don’t you cry. Don’t you cry. Don’t you cry. Don’t shed no tears for me. Don’t you cry. Now, lord don’t cry. Lord, don’t you cry The day I turned 18, a woman I met. Her husband, a banker, he cried and he wept, when he found us in bed. Producing a pistol, he pointed at me. But his hands they were shaking when I shot him with three. Lord, he never fired on me. Don’t you cry. Now don’t you cry. Don’t you cry for that man. With one single pen, and the government men, Lord, he’d a taken your land. Tomorrow they’ll hang me in the middle of town. That woman, she wrote me. Said She won’t be around. said she’s leaving this town. She’s gone. She’s trying to forget my name. and give up a boy. That boy has my name- a child of shame. Won’t you cry? Now won’t you cry? Won’t you cry for my boy? Won’t you cry? Now please shed a tear. Lord what have I done to my boy?
3.
Salvific Efficacy (free) 03:14
Salvifi Efficacy I found my love and then I hated my love and then the World for asking me to love I do not care who my love is with now. I guess I do...I really do I found the Lord and then I hated the Lord and then the World for Needing a lord I do not care who needs the Lord I'll never know If I need him now. If we had a nickel for every cause they'd make more bankers and tax laws and they'd lobby to charge us a dime. The politicians would say, "That's fine." I found the truth and then I hated the truth and then the world for showing such truth. I do not care who sees the truth. I'll never know if I see it now.
4.
Mama, oh Mama What I wouldn't do to have another pint with you. One more last laugh, another word of advice, but no no no Mama, oh Mama What am I gonna do? My boy says he hates me. He hates me. I said those words to you. You just smiled and you said, "Not true." I knew not the world, now I know what I'd done. How did you ever, ever forgive me?
5.
"I love you I want to leave my wife for you and buy you bright and shining rings; take you from all these evil things" I said, I said in my three piece suit in the basement floor, at the church of St. Eleanor. "You love me. I see it in your eyes. My saved soul won't be denied. I'll get clean- Rid my veins of these dirty highs." She said, she said and put her bible down and looked at me like a Lord. The aura of a dirty crown She's sleeping naked in her bed lying so very, very still a graceful work of art that only she can kill. Dreaming of the riches in her new life. I'm the diamond handle but she is the knife You think you are broken? I can brake you more. So many of you little girls you spill from rehab doors. It's a pattern that I copy I just pluck them like a poppy by the time that they've caught I'll be bored. No dirty love they'll deny. No scratch that they won't itch. I'm not married. I'm not rich. I'm just a better high.
6.
Drink my morning coffee out of last night's whiskey glass. 12 more empty hours that I can not pass, until I dream my way to you. "Hold on. hang on." Your words. Your hands through my hair. With you beside me, slept scarred just the same and you dreamt such words for me "Goodbye. goodbye." the words disease my tongue. I gave a mumbled whisper when your name I should sing. Oh, the words I dream for you! last night the streat light came in through the window pain and an empty shadow laid right where'd you'd been and still no words for you. one day when I'm dry. the words will fall like rain and in the graveyard of days I've left dead I'll write them on the stone.

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released February 10, 2011

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Tenacious Bird Of Prey Barnstable, Massachusetts

Brendan O'Donnell is a musician, creative coder and writer living in Centerville, MA releasing music as Tenacious Bird of Prey.

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